How to Not Cum Fast: Tips and Tricks to Last Longer During Sex

So, you want to know how to not cum fast?

The truth is that many men experience premature ejaculation at some point in their lives. There are a number of things that can cause a man to blow his load quickly, and we’ll go over the causes of premature ejaculation in this article, but there are just as many ways to not cum fast, and we’ll go over how to prevent premature ejaculation as well.

The fact that you’re here means that you’ve made the first step towards learning how to not cum fast; this article will list the remaining steps in order so that you can last longer in bed and have more pleasurable sex; Let’s get into it.

Why Do I Cum So Fast?

If you have never had this problem before, then it could very well be the case that you are experiencing either a psychological problem or another health issue, possibly both. Aging is another possible cause of premature ejaculation. For those who don’t have much sexual experience, it could be the case that you just need to learn how to not cum so quickly. Let’s briefly take a look at the underlying conditions which can cause premature ejaculation so that you can determine which is the case and take it from there.

Performance Anxiety

A lot of the time, premature ejaculation is caused by stress or performance anxiety, both of which can affect your selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. It could be that you are thinking about having sexual intercourse too much ahead of time; you anticipate that you will have a poor performance and self-actualize a less than desirable result; this is known as performance anxiety. 


On the other hand, It may be that you have romantic feelings for the person, or it’s your first time having sex with a new girl, and so you are especially nervous; this is general sexual anxiety. In any case, if you are afraid that you will ejaculate prematurely ahead of time, you’ll be stressed in the moment, and you’ll be unlikely to get or give any meaningful sexual satisfaction. 

If you want to learn how to not cum fast, you need to learn the let go and relax, allowing the sex to flow naturally, without being rehearsed or idealized in advance. When you relax, you have more ejaculatory control, and the ejaculatory reflex is slower to manifest during vaginal sex, or any other type of penetrative sex for that matter, so be confident that when the time comes, you’ll deliver, and you and your partner will both have a great orgasm. 

Erectile Dysfunction

If you have trouble getting or sustaining an erection, then it’s very possible that the problem is connected to erectile dysfunction. Erectile dysfunction, or ED., can be caused by numerous factors, including psychological conditions or other health ailments, and severely restricts the blood flow to the penis, which makes it difficult to achieve or keep an erection.

The point is that if you know you have a hard time getting it up, then you will ejaculate fast out of the fear of losing your erection. Treating ED can be a quick fix, or it can involve serious medical work depending on the cause; if you are experiencing ED, be sure to speak with your doctor to treat the root cause.

Psychological Factors

In order to not cum right away, you need to be in the right frame of mind to perform your best. That means being in the present moment, connecting with your partner, and having a clear mind free of any relationship problems. Psychological issues such as depression, unresolved trauma, poor body image, feelings of guilt, shame, or a fear of intimacy can all diminish your sexual performance and prevent you from achieving an orgasm.

The only way you can learn how to not cum fast is by first learning to love and accept yourself, and then having a healthy attitude towards sex with your partner. If mental health issues are affecting your sexual encounters; then you should seek professional medical advice; counseling, or medication may be able to help, and many times such issues can be worked through in sex therapy.


Some people are just particularly sensitive to contact. This can be contact in general or only in particular areas. Of course, everyone is more or less sensitive in their genital areas, which is what makes sex so pleasurable in the first place, but for some people, it’s more than that. Hypersensitivity is by no means common, but you will know if you have the condition.

If your premature ejaculation is a result of hypersensitivity, then be sure to consult your doctor to learn about any available treatment options. One common treatment is to apply a numbing agent, such as one of the many anesthetic creams on the market to reduce sensitivity, but talk with your healthcare provider as we are not doctors, and the information contained within this article is only intended for informational purposes.

Other Health Problems That Can Cause Premature Ejaculation

Nerve damage, hormone problems, and other biological factors such as hyperthyroidism, for example, can cause you to cum fast. If you have been diagnosed with any of these conditions and are ejaculating too quickly during sex, then consult your doctor to learn what options are available for treating premature ejaculation.

Sedentary Lifestyle

Having a sedentary lifestyle can also be a factor in determining your overall health and, by extension, your sexual health and performance. The good news is that most men who exercise regularly can gain control over their sexual performance, so be sure that you make time for physical exercises throughout the week; you’ll last longer in bed, and most women will thank you for it.

Sexual Inexperience

Now, if you haven’t had sex before or haven’t had sexual intercourse many times, let’s put it that way, then you just need to learn how to not cum fast; it’s as simple as that. With time, as you gain more experience having sex, you will naturally last longer in bed. The sensations associated with vaginal sex, although they won’t be new anymore, will still be incredibly pleasurable, in fact, even more so as you’ll be able to stop ejaculating early. 

Also, keep in mind that releasing some semen before you have an orgasm is perfectly normal. This “pre-cum” is nothing to be worried about and is not considered premature ejaculation.


As men age, their sex drive diminishes. Now that’s not a universal truth; we’ve all met a horny old man – they’re out here, but most men find aging affects their sex drive adversely. Now it could be that there is a psychological component involved, or it could just be natural. Speak with your doctor to see if any medications are available to help treat the issue, and always make sure you get explicit permission from a licensed healthcare provider before taking any new sexual enhancement medication.

She's Just Skilled at Sexual Intercourse

Last but certainly not least, it may just be the case that she has pro skills. Listen, some women are incredibly good at making guys cum quickly. Not just any woman, I’m talking about a woman who’s had a ton of experience in bed and knows exactly what she’s doing. Should this be the case, then good job! You’ve got a great partner. Just ask her to let you last longer and have more ejaculatory control; she should be more than happy to oblige and use a sex toy for a few minutes while you regain your stamina, allowing you to delay your ejaculation in bed.

How to Not Cum Fast and Improve Your Sex Life

Now that you know what’s likely to be causing the problem, you can move on to fixing it. Assuming it’s not a psychological or other medical problem causing the problem, the following tips and tricks can help you learn how to not cum fast and overcome premature ejaculation once and for all so that you can last longer in bed and have regular, pleasurable sex with your partner.

Edging and Orgasm Denial

Practice stimulating yourself right up to the point that you are about to cum and then stop. Delay ejaculation. Take a walk, read a book, take a cold shower, do whatever you want to do in life, but you can’t cum. After half an hour or a few hours have passed, go back at it again. You’ll start to cum even quicker than before; relax; it’s all a part of the process. Don’t cum.

When you get used to stopping yourself from cumming then your brain will be conditioned to believe that you don’t need to cum fast and might not even cum at all, so when the time comes for sex, your brain will come along for the ride, wondering if you’ll be allowed to cum or not instead of dictating the whole experience beforehand.

If you want more information on Edging, then once you’ve finished this article, I recommend you read my mega guide on lasting longer in bed.

Kegel Exercises

Performing Kegels to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles can be an excellent way to condition your body to not cum fast. These are the muscles that you use to regulate the flow of urine or when you ejaculate. Male kegel exercises, when done routinely, can help you last much longer during sex by giving you control of when you cum rather than you guessing if and when it will happen. 

In addition to improving your performance in bed, strengthening your pelvic floor muscles can also help maintain healthy pelvic organs such as the bladder and bowels, and many men find they have reduced anxiety during penetrative sex with their partner when they strengthen their pc muscles as well which helps them stop ejaculating so early and delay their orgasm which leads to a better sex life.


Guys, learn how to build up to sex. If you just dive right into penetration or getting a blowjob, you’ll be very likely to cum fast. Think about it; you’re going from no stimulation to intense stimulation in an instant; it happens so fast that it happens – so fast. Slow it down; build up to sex by engaging in foreplay with your partner, this way; you’ll get used to having an erection for a prolonged period of time which builds stamina and will help you last longer in bed. She will thank you for it as well.

Use Toys

If you are just in a funk and haven’t been performing your best in bed lately, then try using some sex toys the next time you have sex. By switching between your own penis and the toy, you will be able to keep her pleasure going and keep your erection going strong. It will seem as though you’ve been having sex for hours, but the secret is that the toy has done the heavy lifting. Bro code!


Finally, guys – it’s simple – Jerk off beforehand. If you know you have a hot date that’s going to lead to sex, masturbate before the date, you’ll naturally last longer. Get used to masturbating with a Fleshlight or another similar male masturbator. Male masturbators have been designed to replicate the sensations of vaginal, anal, and oral sex; many are even ribbed for extra pleasure; by masturbating routinely with a male masturbator, the sensation of having real sex won’t be unfamiliar. You’ll be able to last longer because you are used to it.


Well, my friend, you came here because you wanted to learn how to not cum fast; hopefully, you have. Remember, it’s an issue that most guys will have at one time or another, like a cold or constipation, it can be treated, and it’s perfectly normal. By treating the underlying condition and practicing the tips and tricks outlined above, you should be able to get back in the saddle, get her off, and put her back wet every time.

Finally, lasting longer is just the start, and I cover it in more detail in my mega guide here.

But, if you want more tips and tricks to pleasing your partner every time you get between the sheets, then click below and enter your email address to get six of my most popular videos free.

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